Sealand Sports and Pineapples...? How to call for 'Help' when you don't have the words.

Don't worry, I'll explain all. 

A lot of people in British American Football know about the Seahawks. Some know about the tours we’ve been on, some know about the group photos they all take at the end of the games and some know how we in a genuinely ‘fun’ way poke fun at the British American Football Association.

Bet ya there aren’t many that know the ‘why’ behind the Seahawks though….

Brace yourselves, we're getting heavy here folks...

At the end of 2017, I stepped away from being the GM at the Chester Romans. I’d done the five years I said I’d do in running it, had a ball and lived and breathed everything Romans, it completely took over my life and I figured I’d take some time to relax and figure out what I wanted to do next. In 2017, I’d got married, had a great season with the Romans, been on my first ever European trip with the Ouse Valley Exiles and I was having a great time working at Liverpool Airport. What a great year.

Up to the summer of 2018 was completely different. I was a ‘nobody’ and I felt like I was completely forgotten at the Romans, which had been my entire life since 2005. I put weight on because I wasn’t training for anything and I was just completely miserable, I fell into a pit of depression, literally only leaving the house to go to work, then coming back and watching the same series on repeat – I can pretty much narrate the early seasons of South Park verbatim.

It wasn’t the loss of the sport, it was the loss of the people, I was lonely, but had absolutely no idea how to reach out to friends to ask how they were or what they were up to. I know, a big outgoing, fun-loving idiot like me was considering doing ‘something really really stupid’ because I couldn’t find the words to say, “I need a friend.”

Pulling myself out of it

It took a lot, but there were a handful of people that gave me the time of day and I could slowly come out of my ‘pit’ and get involved in things. Even just going to the gym again and seeing people started bringing me out of this shell I’d built for myself. I signed on with the Halton Spartans all down to Simon Wainwright. He gets all the credit for dragging me out of this one and keeping me alive. There, I said it.

Coming into the tail end of 2018, I had a quiet word with myself to never let myself be lonely again, not only that, but I’d make an effort to make sure other people never felt like that because if I can feel like that, there’ll be millions of other people that feel the same way.

So after the precursor to the Seahawks, the Thundering Herd, folded, I was always going to build something else. The short version of this being I got the phone out, called my mates and we played in Dublin. If you want the full version, it’s on the Sealand website or just ask one of the Seahawks themselves.

Just one simple rule...

The bit that not a lot of folk know though is what was going on in the background in terms of looking after everyone. I LIVED on my phone in the early days, checking in with everyone, all the time because it was all brand new. I made everything as cheap as possible so it didn’t matter so much about people’s economic background and I made sure everyone knew the ‘no d*ckhead’ rule and that if I thought someone was bullying, over arrogant, nasty or in any way not looking after the players in the club, they were booted out.

The Seahawks isn’t a club where results come first. This is a club where the welfare of the players, coaches and staff come first. It’s a club where people can come, enjoy football, but know they’ve always got support and they’ve always got a friend, all year round.

Lost for words

I remembered back to 2018 and thought about the times I couldn’t reach out because I didn’t have the words to do so and remembered a viral video from a while back, “My safe word is Pineapple juice…” and thought, what’s that got to do with anything? But it was perfect. It doesn’t. So now, if a Seahawk receives a message from ANYONE with ‘Pineapple’ or the pineapple emoji, it’s someone reaching out for a friend. We’re not mental health professionals, we can’t diagnose, but we can message, phone call, video call, meet up, whatever, no matter the time of day or what day it is. It’s written into the Seahawks rulebook so that people understand the weight of the responsibility when they join the club and they have the opportunity to opt out of joining up if they want to.

It’s not for everyone. It can be a scary prospect to try and help someone when you’re tired, busy or life is kicking your arse, but if you want to be a part of something bigger than yourself, it’s a small ask to send a message, “What’s up, you okay?” because if someone’s reaching out like this, you know it’s a last resort.

Time to make this bigger

This isn’t going to be contained to the Seahawks any more, this is being implemented across all of Sealand Sports and eventually to the Principality of Sealand itself. If there are clubs out there that want to adopt it, it’d be amazing, but I appreciate that people might want to do their own thing. Either way, mental health is something that needs looking after in the world. It’s something we still don’t fully understand, but we can do our bit to try and make a difference.

I’ve been very lucky, I’ve had people that have metaphorically ‘popped their head in’ at the right time and I’ve leant on them to pull myself out of a very very dark place and find a way back.

So never forget, you can send a pineapple to a Sealander and we’ll reply, you’re not alone in this, we got you. 🍍

Big loves. 

Mike Ireland - Minister for Sports and Culture.

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